My first draft of the speech I have to give several times this month

We are a society that lives in cars. Now we don’t literally spend our entire day in the closed confines of our vehicle, but we go through life with the illusion that we travel alone. We’re not concerned if our actions offend or hurt others around us in the same way we don’t care to rudely lay down the horn when we think the person driving in front us is sitting too long at a traffic light. Some of us have no problem with even flashing an obscene gesture. This is something we would never do while standing face to face with someone, or is it?

I remember an event that happened to me, while attending the University of Kentucky. I lived in a coed dorm at the time and was dating a girl who lived on the women’s floor. And I was in ….. love, or at least my semblance of love that I had at that time. This girl had it all … attractive, outgoing, fun and most importantly she was a very strong Christian…. She was the type who attracted others to her. Her roommate… we’ll call her Elise, because … that’s her name (pause) was her exact opposite. Elise wore all black, painted her fingernails black, and frowned a lot…. basically the kind of person who repelled people from her. Anytime I spoke to Elise she would grunt at me and shortly after leave the room. I’m not sure whether it was due to a jealousy of others happiness or just a general sour disposition. I was told by my girlfriend and her friends I should give her a wide girth, in fact their exact words were, “she hates you.” Well, I just couldn’t have that so I was determined to make her smile. It actually became a game for me. Anytime time I saw her I would say “Hey Elise … did you miss me?” Or, “Come on over here and give me a hug Elise.” To which she would grunt out a no and leave the room. This continued well into the semester, and I felt I wasn’t making any headway. Then came Christmas break and the big break up. The girl I thought I loved was gone. I was bummed. I moped around the house and basically lost my smile for a while. Things got better when I returned to campus and was busy once again. I moved on. I decided to take a break from dating for a while and along came the most dreaded day to most single people … Valentine’s Day! Not dating anyone, I didn’t expect to receive anything that year. I came in after a long day of classes and saw a small card slipped under the door. It was the type that kids normally give to each other … had a cartoon on the front. It wasn’t the picture on the front that was of note, but the words on the back, and the reason I have kept this card on my refrigerator to this day. It was written by Elise, the all black wearing roommate. It read

Chris,

To the nicest guy on the first floor, thanks for helping my time of need, I will never forget it. I hope you have a wonderful Valentine ’s Day.

Elise

You must remember what type of gesture this was for her. This was like doing cartwheels and wearing all pink. It was so unlike the Elise I knew the previous semester, and that’s how I knew it was sincere. Apparently my words had an effect on her. I learned a lesson that day. I had no idea she was going through a hard time. But I determined from that day forth that I would treat my words as gifts and not as weapons. It would have been so easy to return her dislike of me. I had done it so many times with other people. But I was fortunate this time.

Not knowing what troubles those around us are experiencing we should err on the side of caution and treat them better than they may be treating us.

I leave you with a quote from (Prov. 18:21). “Death and life are in the power of the tongue" The implication is that the choice of how to use the tongue, for good or for evil, is our own.